Saturday, May 1, 2010

It's All About Energy...

Many years ago I became ill with encephalitis and meningitis, I decided to kill myself and fell asleep instead. When I awoke it was to a male voice unknown to me speaking in my ear telling me this was not my life to take it was God’s life. That set me on a road which has completely changed my life. I no longer am a computer consultant for a living. I first became a client of a practitioner of Reiki and Cranial/Sacral energy work. Then I become a student of Reiki and cranial/sacral work. Now I am a practitioner and almost four years ago I added a biofeedback stress reduction device brining another dimension to the work.

It amazes me today to look back at where that road from what doctors told me was an incurable and terminal illness has taken me to the place where I live today; in a constant state of grace. I was grossly injured by the illnesses. I had just been told for the “nth” time that I was seriously injured by the diseases and that I needed to stop working, apply for disability and concentrate on maintaining the “remission” the doctors all were so excited about.

The physician of record treating me for the viral condition and it’s after-effects asked if he could write an article about me to send to the New England Journal of Medicine because I seemed to have defied medical opinion and was the only person of record in the U.S. who had this combination of diseases as an adult and managed to continue to live autonomously.

I’ve been asked how it is that I do that. I tell people that I live in a non-linear world. They usually ask me next what in the world is non-linear. What I have found is that I no longer live in a world where I am my brain or my illness or my possessions or anything else of the world. I live in the world I’m just not of it anymore. I don’t wear a watch, haven’t for years. And, if I need to be somewhere, I wake up on time by my inner clock to get where I need to be.

It is completely obvious that Spirit evidently isn’t finished with me yet. I still have purpose. There are things in this life I still have to do and see, feel and be. I am many years away from the original illness and contrary to all medical beliefs I have overcome many of the issues they thought were life-threatening and do live an autonomous life. If I become over-tired, stressed or become infected with flu or a cold I still can get out of remission. I’ve learned to balance periods of exertion with periods of rest. When I get caught up in what other people think about me, I can move into old behaviors in a heartbeat and make myself sick again. When I can stay in peace and am grounded and centered I have a very loving, peaceful, joyful life.

One day I was listening to a tape of a PBS special featuring Dr. Wayne Dyer talking about his latest book. I enjoyed listening to the uplifting things he had to say and then he said, “don’t die with the music still in you.”

I felt tears brimming up when he said it. I didn’t want to die with the music still in me. It hit me so strongly and I’ve never forgotten it. It “resonated” everywhere in and around me.

I knew then and still do know that I had to let my music out. I must give who I am away, share with others, help who I can and let the music flow. When I work with people who are just awakening to the principles of learning how to live life on life’s terms, when I watch them come to rely on a power greater than themselves and see them begin to give up trying to control everything in their lives -- I sing to them.

There are a few songs I like that touch even the toughest person and break the shell of isolation and holding back to let them shed tears and release old resentments and fears. One of them is very simple and quite profound the more I urge people to sing it again and again always with more feeling. It is a song I learned from a Unity Musical Church in Bellevue, WA. It has three lines that when sung over and over until will reach your very soul.

“I am free, I am unlimited. There are no chains to bind me. I am free, I am unlimited right now.”

REPEAT. Try it, try it louder and louder, sing it from your belly, feel it and I promise it will empower you.

I sing it in the car I sing it any where I am whenever I feel the need to sing it. I urge you to sing it, say it, write it, put it on a continuous tape recording and listen to yourself sing or say it. It works. Use any tune that works for you. I can’t put the notes into this book, I don’t know how or I would. My present to you.

My other present is never, never, never give up! That is different from surrendering yourself to your Source, the Divine in all of us. That means sing something every day that uplifts you. It doesn’t matter if you feel you can sing or not. I used to sing flat on many notes, until a man for whom I had done some computer work (yes I can do that today), repaid me by sharing his knowledge of Alexander Technique. Twice or three times we met for about an hour and from the first time we met and I sang for him through the last time I sang and played the guitar, I was never off key. What he taught me was to prepare the instrument - that would be me, close my eyes, go inside and be still a moment and when I was ready, sing. What this did for me was to connect my heart with the music. When I sing from my heart, I never sing off key or out of sync. I already know the song I want to sing, so once the instrument is prepared, the song sings itself. And, with the kind of feeling that touches another person at a feeling level.

I no longer sing songs as songs, striving to just get through the song on key. I don’t even think about that. I don’t think at all. I am present in the moment to the story of the music and the story gets told with all the feeling it needs.

Being present is vital to the way I live today. You’ve heard or possibly read (even on a bumper sticker), “be here now”. By that, I mean this moment as I write these words is the only moment of my life. The next moment hasn’t happened yet and I’m not living in the last moment before this one. Each moment is the now, the only life I have. Now is the only life I have - and now, and now. When you talk and I listen, I listen with everything in me because I am spending my now with you. It is my life it had better have meaning for I am giving a moment of my life for it. It is the only moment I have. That is what being present means to me.

I went missing for so many years. Living with resentment and anger over the past which is past and I’m the only one affected by my past if I hang on to it. Who or whatever I’ve been resentful toward from the past isn’t feeling the resentment and anger, I am. They aren’t staying awake at night reliving the old hurts, or not living their life out of fear from the “terrible” things that happened to me way back then. The sage was right, ‘whoever lives with resentment and wants revenge needs to dig two graves’.

It is certain that my hanging onto resentment, fear and anger, kept me soul sick and sliding into dying on the inside which was leading me to dying on the outside by my thoughts and behaviors. I must leave righteous anger to those better qualified to handle it than me. I’m not sure anyone is qualified to handle righteous anger, but then I don’t know everyone.

What I know for me is that negative emotions make me sick. And I don’t want to live sick anymore. The result in being sick for me would be death in the most hurtful manner. I know I will die one day and that’s not my concern. Death is just another beginning. It is the cycle of life. All nature dies, is reborn and dies again. I believe that applies to me too.

Death isn’t my concern, life is. How will I live this life I’ve been given? Recently I was introduced to a harmonic resonancing solution to dis-ease on all four levels. It makes perfect sense to this, albeit flawed, number oriented brain of mine. It is based on a book entitled, Sanctuary and according to Dr. Dyer’s children, once you read it you will say, “Sanctuary very much”. It is based on the premise which many have spent their lives working toward to one man who with the aid of others, did make it happen and has used it with many hundreds of people, now thousands. It takes the notion that all our tendencies to have that which keeps us separate from our source and all ultimate healing are found within our bodies, either ethereal, chakra, or physical. And that all life is resonance, harmonic and part of a whole. We are indeed holographs of the great I AM living along frozen fragments of light. There is of course much more to it than I can put into words here.

There have been other processes from the ancients to today’s way/s to integrate technology with spirituality. With Max’s system, a picture of me is put onto a tray where with laser technology and algorithms for every dis-ease (he doesn’t mean illness, nor anything the medical community would deal with). He means that which is within us and has the propensity to keep us spiritually out of sync, not living to our potential, tired, living at a lowered consciousness than we came here to live and never finding the real reason we came into this earth walk at all. So, using the techniques he and his staff have created, the photograph of me can be bombarded with tendency erasers to put it mildly and most simply. As this is done to my photograph, I physically, spiritually, mentally and emotionally release from the place of my highest consciousness those things that keep me less than as perfect as I can be at any one moment in time.

This is fascinating to me and something I am in the process of pursuing and am excited to be involved with. I have long felt that all is about harmonics and resonance. Music is number, number is language, all in our known world is alive with harmonic and resonance. The rocks sing. The trees have different voices. These are facts known from the dawn of time. And now we have a way of balancing our energies. A way to allow to each of us and all of us as a whole to come together and raise the consciousness of the planet to a point where we don’t have to make ourselves extinct or live in the nuclear horror which has been painted for us since biblical days.

And since I was introduced to this system I have come to know about many other new and ancient methods of creating the same result.

How does this speak to my earlier question of how will I live this life I’ve been given? I hope to live it in harmony with all life, free from the need to be frozen by fear, paralyzed by worry, or the need to create real diseases in my body by not living my life the way I was meant to – naturally and in love.

Everything is energy.